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How Dare you DARE TO BE YOU!!!


A couple of years ago, I developed a webinar called, "How dare you...Dare to be YOU!" to give people the opportunity to explore the importance of developing appropriate boundaries in their personal and professional life. I always thought the question, "How dare you?", was amusing because the person who asks the question is putting themselves in the position of importance as if the other individual should not have the courage to challenge them in addressing issues. Those who put themselves in a position of importance have problems with boundary crossing in the lives of others. Their personal behavioral problems and relational issues exemplifies their need to confront whatever situations that may arise in relationships. They may very well be the reason one should ask, "How dare YOU!"

Those with boundary issues often have problems with those who enforce the consequences of boundary crossing. It is as if they are subconsciously questioning, “If I do not enforce my boundaries, how dare you think that you can enforce your boundaries with me!” The question then becomes, "How dare YOU....Dare to be YOU?!?" This question is a declaration I make announcing that everyone has the right to put themselves in a position of importance to set boundaries and make positive changes in their lives. I believe everyone should have the courage to challenge themselves and anyone else who has the audacity to cross those boundary lines they set for themselves. Everyone should become comfortable with enforcing the consequences they set for boundary crossing in their personal realm of influence.

Standing up for yourself takes courage and requires that you "Dare to Be YOU!" We should never allow for anyone to have the power over us to make us feel less than one of God's beautiful creations. Many people may attempt to cause others to feel inferior by questioning their boldness. They are insecure and find fault within themselves so they desire for others to feel the same way. I am reminded of the biblical account of Eve in the garden of Eden when the serpent caused her to question her ability to eat from the tree of knowledge of good and evil. He caused her to second guess herself and question God's divine direction. Many people will attempt to cause you to question your gifts, talents, or abilities to cause you to feel inferior. They will attempt to cause you to question whether God has blessed you with any form wisdom, knowledge, understanding. These individuals desire to cause you to feel foolish, ignorant, worthless, and weak. Like the serpent, their objective is to block you from acknowledging who you are and to receive what God intended for your life. God desires for you to walk BOLD and COURAGEOUS (Joshua 1:7).

How can one walk bold and courageous with all their imperfections?

Walking with boldness and courage requires that you walk in confidence; however, your confidence should not be in your imperfections. Your confidence should be found in the One whom you put your faith and trust, that He will lead and guide you into all truth (Proverbs 3:26; 2 Corinthians 3:4,12, Psalms 25:5). Walking with confidence means that you seek to do what is right, speak the truth with sincerity, and are without blame (Psalms 15:2). So with boldness and courage, you can be confident that God has your back when you put your faith and trust in Him and when you seek to do what is right, speak the truth with sincerity, and walk without blame.

To walk without blame means that you conciously make the choice in your daily interactions with people to treat them with love. This does not mean that you use hurtful words to "Tell it like it is" in your own attempt to "Keep it Real". People can often "Tell it like it is" and tell it wrong and they can "Keep it Real" and be real wrong. Their attempts are not to help their neighbor but to hurt them by causing them to feel inferior about themselves. Many people may think they know what it means to love their neighbor (Leviticus 19:18); however, we find that this is not the truth as we listen to the news, read messages on social media, and view the countless acts of violence on television. 1 Corinthians 13:4-6 tells us that "Love is patient, love is kind, it isn’t jealous, it doesn’t brag, it isn’t arrogant, it isn’t rude, it doesn’t seek its own advantage, it isn’t irritable, it doesn’t keep a record of complaints, it isn’t happy with injustice, but it is happy with the truth. Love puts up with all things, trusts in all things, hopes for all things, endures all things (Common English Bible).

Walking in love with boldness and courage does not mean that you position yourself to be emotionally or physically hurt by others. Setting boundaries is a means of protection that allows for you to take responsibility for what you can control (actions and reactions), who you allow in your personal realm of influence, and what you allow to happen in your life. You essentially are taking authority over your life. You cannot control the thoughts, emotions, and behavior of others; however, you can control yours. Keeping this in mind, be bold, be strong, be courageous, walk in love, taking authority over what you can control...go head...I Dare You to be YOU!

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